Hmmm, yeah, good question. Where is my head at? Life’s got kinda stressful recently and I haven’t really had the time to do everything that I need to. Finances are really not going well in life in general (it doesn’t help when your car gets trashed and you get screwed over by those lovely insurance folks) and that has put a lot of pressure on getting results at the poker table. The end result is that I’m really not doing what I know that I should. If I have time for anything poker related I feel like that has to be playing to try and pick my bankroll back up from the floor, so I end up playing instead of analysing.
I’m now in the situation that I’ve gone from having a small but consistent trickle of cash finding it’s way into my bank account, to scrapping around a tiny bankroll and not really getting anywhere with the methods that I’m using, and having no money finding it’s way home. I know really I should deposit, but I think I might just be too stubborn. I hate putting money into poker accounts, it feels so dirty.
So here I am making no profit at the tables whilst prioritising that over spending time studying and analysing what I do. I joined the Nick Wealthall training programme a month ago, and I wasn’t too sure about continuing on to the second month because of the cost. It’s a monthly fee of $47 and I got a free month’s trial. I said to myself that so long as it paid for itself I would continue to pay for it. To be honest though, even if I’d had a really lean month and only made the $47 in that first month with nothing else I probably would have convinced myself that it was justified. I’m a contradiction, I know.
The second month’s materials are about to be released, and my bank account is about to be billed. I’ve already convinced myself to continue, even though I’ve actually made a loss this month. As I keep reminding myself though, I am in profit playing no limit, it’s fixed limit that’s killed me.
I do have faith in the training. What I’ve learnt so far includes concepts that make total sense but I’ve never come across before. It’s all based around no-limit games. I’ve got plenty of no limit experience in terms of tournaments, but I think quite oddly, I’m really not that used to playing no limit cash tables. I’ve got a lot to learn. Unfortunately knowing that hasn’t seemed to be enough to get me to prioritise studying. Nor have I spent enough time configuring Poker Tracker 4, so I’ve not always had the statistics that I need to hand.
The consistency of my wins prior to this month has always been propped up by my results at fixed limit, which at the moment I’m really struggling with. I think that I’ve ended up changing the way I play but can’t quite pin down how to change it back. I either need to focus on getting that back or embrace the change, and frankly I need a bit of a shake up.
Embracing the change means really concentrating on getting good at no limit cash tables. I am starting to find my feet and I often realise the mistakes I make. The next step is not making them.